Sunday, May 29, 2005

the religious beach

It seems like I have a lot of catching up to do, what with not blogging for a couple of exciting months.

The plan was to go to the large crater down south during pesach. They have colorful sand there. But then we heard that the crater fell down on someone, so we couldn't go there. How in God's good name does a crater fall down on someone? It's a hole!!! In any case we spent the day in the gaza strip instead. Gaza is a pretty cool place, when you are not ducking Kassams. We Galileans have an appreciation for rockets as the Hizballah has just announced their 12,000 rockets are pointed at the northern heartland. Thank God, Maalot is past Shlomi, so they are taking the brunt of it for us. Back to Gaza. We had a nice day at the beach and taking a stroll from one end of gaza to the other. They let us off in neve dekalium and told us that if we wanted to leave we had to walk to the agam. With 8 kids. at least we had our stroller. The third day of our trip we wanted to go see the sea turtles who were being thrown out of their homes for the displaced settlers. We felt pretty bad for them, but they also don't serve in the army, except maybe in elite units, and are parasites on the nation because none of them work. So we actually hate them just like settlers. or something. But we couldn't find the turtles so we asked some random chiloni where a good beach was and he told us we had to go to the religious beach in alei sinai. religious beach? you mean separate? no. its mixed. just religious.

So we went to the religious beach. and that's what it was a mixed beach with out any mostly naked women. some of the men were mostly naked, but apparantly no one has a problem with that. I think it's because women don't get upset when their husbands see guys without shirts on. Go and figure. But I digress. So we had a very enjoyable day at the beach and now we have seen 2 nice areas that are being given away for apparantly no reason. Except I think Sharon has a hard-on for the turtles. I think he was traumatized by them as a child and he planned this whole operation just to wipe them out. That bastard.

The best was yet to come. On oiur drive home we stopped in kiryat malachi. Talk about real meat. My wife, god bless her heart, found some huge mehadrin (kind of expensive) steaks on the bonem, such has never been seen in Israel. They looked like American cows. They were delicious, but not like American ones. American ones are better. But Israelis don't appreciate them. We invited over an israeli couple for American steaks so that they could taste gashmiyus for once in their lives and they thought maybe chicken was healthier. And maybe we could come over sometime for grilled cucumbers. CUKES!!!!!!! Anyways. They were told they have to leave maalot so they found a home somewhere else.

I'm done for now.


Batya said...

You should be a tour guide!

rockofgalilee said...

thank you. I make up good stuff for my children when we go places, but thinking rational people (the 2 or 3 of them still around) would never buy my commentary.