Apparantly we have just discovered for sure that I am not the mashiach. I know this is disappointing to all of you (except my wife), but I am dealing with it rather well. My neighbor mentioned it to me first and said that now I didn't have a chance to be king (to the relief of my wife).
This was all revealed a couple days ago when Rav Kaduri passed away. Rav Kaduri was a known kabbalist. Not the kind that milks you out of all your money and calls you Esther, but the kind that just learned Kabbala. I actually don't know what kabbalists do, but I read a story about Babi Sali's grandfather that he flew across the sea on a flying carpet because he missed his boat. I used this story against a sefardi who told he he didn't believe that the bais hamikdash courtyard expanded to fit more people then could physically fit in. He said it was scientifically impossible, and therefore it was allegorical and meant that a lot of people were there. I answered him, that I don't know exactly what happened back then, but if believes that Babi Sali's grandfather flew across the sea on a flying carpet then he should have no problem believing that 100 people could fit in a place where only 50 people could physically fit.
Anyways, that's all tangental. The crux of the story is that I have never met Rav Kaduri. I've never even seen him (other then a picture in the paper). I heard that Babi Sali and also some other rabbi promised Rav Kaduri that he would meet mashiach. I also heard that he met mashiach either last year or a couple months ago. That basically knocks me out of the running. It also knocks a bunch of other people who I know out of the running. But for all of you who have actually met Rav Kaduri, it is possible that you are the mashiach and we are waiting for you.
(unless, of course, he met mashiach ben yosef and they haven't annointed a mashiach ben david yet. But I'm not holding my breath)