manipulation

Some people hear the word manipulation and are instantly repulsed. Its 12 letters simply makes it 3 times as bad as a 4 letter word. I will agree that there are manipulative abuses, but call a spade a spade. Lets be honest, everyone manipulates and it is not a bad thing when done properly and correctly. To put it simply, manipulation is the act of specifically doing something that will increase the chance of other actions being performed (my own definition). A teacher promising no homework to students who are quiet during the class is manipulating them. A wife who puts the garbage bag in a place where her husband will see it is manipulating him.
God himself, according to Rashi, puts a high value on manipulation. When moshe was taking donations for building the temple he refused to take the mirrors of the women because they were used for sexual purposes. God told moshe that it was the best donation of them all because the women used them to manipulate their husbands who were not interested into being interested. The mirrors were then melted down and used to make the laver.

I'm not saying that all manipulation is good, but it can be a very powerful tool to get people to do what they should be doing or really want to do anyways, just don't know it yet.
In short, if you want something from someone figure out what will get them to change their minds. Then apply the right sort of pressure or modify the situation until they feel on their own that this is exactly what they want to do.

The innocent, terrorized people of sderot are currently on a hunger strike to try and manipulate the government into doing something about the daily barrage of rockets that are falling on their town.

As Dr. Seuss says, "It's easy to win you just have to know how."